There's something to be said about being able to see without being seen. I want to be invisible, to disappear, but I still want to watch, to see, to know.

I want access to you without giving you any to me. To lurk silently and secretly: out of sight, but not out of mind.

I want to observe you through the clear side of a one-way mirror, to become air and hold your hand without you knowing. In short, I want to be a living ghost....to glide about where and when I please. To explore. To do everything I fancy and then some. To see you. To see you without you knowing. Without you knowing how much I miss you, how watching you from behind a screen tortures me and sustains me at once. I want to make you wonder where I am, make you long for me even though I am right there... make you look for me, and make you find me.

In some ways, that's why I deleted my facebook page. To erase myself for the time being. To make it difficult to find me, or, well, my virtual self, anyway.